Tuesday, August 16, 2011

6 weeks PP

Well 6 weeks has come and gone.  I started back to work on Monday and go to my dr. appointment on Friday.  I'm hoping for good news and clearance to start working out again.  Feeling really ready to lose this baby weight....I have lost 23 lbs. and have a good 12 to go to feel good again.  I hope I work out as much as I have in my mind I will. I'm feeling great and feeling completely back to normal.  People are still asking me how I feel and if I miss the baby or if I feel weird.  I can say with 100% that I don't miss the baby and I'm glad to have had the experience and know that I can mark it off my "bucket" list.  It's an honor to have done it and to have shared the gift of life with someone.  I'm so happy that I get to stay in the family and watch my surro baby grow up but I'm so glad he's not mine. LOL  It is not the right time in my life.  I would do it 100 times over for people if I could, but one that's not possible and two I have had 2 c-sections so I need to be very wise in my next decision whether to have another of my own or give someone else a baby.  I think I was meant to do this, but also have seen so many of my surro friends having difficulties right now and that scares me. I think maybe I should just be thankful that I got the experience and move on...but then it seems kind of selfish of me and think I could help so many others out. So who knows if or when I'll do another surrogacy.  It definitely won't be in the next year, but maybe 2 years, I'll consider it again.  I'm definitely not getting any younger and they like to have "younger" women....so we shall see.  But for now, I'm thankful for all the blessings in my life, thankful for all the amazing people in my life and just living and loving life...and hoping maybe one day I'll find love...but if I don't, I have my daughter and she's my number 1 regardless!!!